One Moment in Time

Circa 1966-7, I would think.

But what one earth were we watching or doing?

Or were we just acting at the behest of the photographer aka our dad?

God knows, I would not know. The photographer is long gone. We were too young to know or remember anything. But I believe the location is Batu Gajah, and it must be the bedroom.

Anyway...

My bro and I

My eldest sister - on the right, and her unidentified companion

Tak ada Harumanis, Chokanan pun jadilah

I tried to get some saplings for me to plant in KL, but it was too late to go and find nursery that afternoon.

With the price of Harumanis fruits going up through the roof, the saplings are also expensive nowadays, according to Doc Farizul. IT is only natural, I guess. Next trip, I told him. I must get several for me to bring home and I am sure Harumanis would prosper in hot Kuala LUmpur.

If you think Perlis is hot, KL is even hotter. It is unnatural heat to be honest. Heat from car and air-conditioned buildings. I am sure we have more of those things than Peghelih. If Doc Farizul is correct about the heat making Harumanis prosperous in Peghelih, iit should even be better in KL.

May be in a week or so, if by the grace of Allah, that these are my rezeki,
I would be able to taste my Chokanan. It is reasonably sized fruit
at this stage and it is squatting level to be honest. I'd to trim
the tree to be as similar height to same height as the Harumanis in Perlis

Anyway, I am please to show you my Chokanan in front of my house. It is fruiting. For the second time, I must tell you. So far it has survived itchy hands. No one has touched it and most of the fruits are still hanging on the trees.

Should I wrap it?

What do you think?

Mother of Mine

Mother of mine you gave to me,
all of my life to do as I please,
I owe everything I have to you,
Mother sweet Mother of mine.

Mother of mine when I was young
you showed me the right way things had to be done,
without your arms where would I be,
Mother sweet Mother of mine.

Mother you gave me happiness,
much more than words can say,
I pray the Lord that he may bless you
every night and every day.

Mother of mine now I am grown
and I can walk straight all on my own,
I'd like to give you what you gave to me,
Mother sweet Mother of mine.

Mother of mine now I am grown
and I can walk straight all on my own,
I'd like to give you what you gave to me,
Mother sweet Mother of mine.
Mother sweet Mother of mine.

I remember during the 70s, RTM did a big music concert with many of the majority of the singers from the old days (60s) were involved. This song was sung by Indra Shahrir - the son of Nona Asiah(??), but obviously the Malay version of this classic would be titled Mamaku Sayang.

I like that version too, as it remained etched in my memory.

Visit me again this Ramadhan, Mak

PROLOGUE

I wrote this in July last year. Specifically last Ramadhan. For some reasons, I did not get to publish and tonight while going through my blog, I realized that I should get this entry in, quickly before it lost its meaning.

And hope that I will see her again.

This Ramadhan, assuming I get to see and experience Ramadhan again, that is.

Here goes.

Credit - loveinglass.wordpress.com

I was awaken immediately after. I felt refreshed. Really refreshed.

It was such a good feeling in the aftermath, so much so I was wide awake afterward, even though the clock says 4.15 am. It was a tad too early to get ready for sahur, so I went to take my ablution.

I had to recite the Quran for her.

In the dream, we were at this wonderful hotel 60 km away from Houston. From the balcony of the hotel, we could see swaying coconut trees and sandy beaches more suited for Hawaii or tropical country than Houston. But I was conscious that we are 60 km from Houston; I said so to someone in my dream.

Mak did not say anything. Not to me, not to anybody. But it was clearly her; her sister MC Kam was around too.

In my subconscious, I was not aware that mak is no longer with us. It was like she was with us - well and alive. It was so normal but it felt like we were on vacation.

So I went down, and started reciting the Quran for her (and bapak). I was really at peace at the wee hours of that morning. It was serene.

Half an hour later, Arif came trotting down. Upon seeing me on the sofa, he immediately announced that he dreamt of Nenek. Nenek according to him was lying on the sofa in our living room. Apparently she had fever. Simple fever, according to him.

I told my sister that may be Mak did come to visit us for the two of us to see her in our dreams. On the same night, at nearly the same time. Who knows; it could be precisely the same time.

After all, it is Ramadan.

Friday 0500 hours
19 July 2013

Giving back to society - sambil menyelam, makan harumanis

I should be doing more of this.

No, not 'menyelam'. Of course not. Not at this age. It is a tad too late, I have to admit. And I have no desire anymore. In any case, I have never been a water person. I can drown in a bowl of water. LOL.

I am talking back about giving back to society. I am a product of affirmative actions and I need to give back to society.

And of course eating the famous harumanis.

But I have been procrastinating. There are many opportunities, but work schedules and other excuses always crept into the picture.

And my desire to have an easy life.

I am talking about giving back to society of course. I am not talking about every now and then giving alms to the needy. I am talking about giving back to society in a more formal way than doing the occasional alms at the mosques.

I was both relieved and apprehensive when a friend of mine - a lecturer at a small university, called one day to ask me to do a lecture at his department. Relieved in teh sense that now I have an avenue to give back. Apprehensive since I was asked to do thermo, which is not my forte. Never mind that I will be talking to undergraduate students who probably will accept whatever I will say as the Quranic truth.

So instead I tried to chicken my way out by asking another friend.

But in the end, I was told to just give a talk on materials I am comfortable with.

Hj Juares giving lecture to a teh final year students. Mine was the 2nd year
students and hence it is a bigger group

So coupled with the mango season in Perlis, I knew I was going to have fun there.

So for the first time in many years, I was given a flight other than Air Asia and a five star hotel. Something I would not do if I had to pay for them. I am a cheapskate; I care for the company cashflow and profitability. So I travel prudently.

The travel on MAS is eventful to be honest. MAS is on a bad luck run perhaps. I am not a superstitious person. Not at all. But that landing in Alor Star that night was perhaps the worst I had experienced. It landed on the tarmac very hard - a thud to be honest, and immediately we can smell tyres burning in the cabin. My fellow passengers on both side of me looked at each other. We weren't afraid or nervous - we were already on the ground.

Knowing what Arif had told me about landing, I thought the plane ought to be grounded. I don't really know if we had experienced 5G of force while landing; if we did, the aircraft would be grounded and may not able to fly back to KL that night. But the bad luck continue for MAS. I do hope it would end soon.

For the first time in more than a decade, someone was waiting at the airport and would take us to the hotel. It is absurd. It is a a very strange feeling - something I had not felt for a long, long time. Not since Narita, where the Japanese would be waiting for you with a signboard - that's Japanese hospitality for you.

Comfortable and inviting - that's what I like about this hotel and bed.

The hotel is brand new, I believe. Perhaps the best I had stayed for a long, long time. And with reasonable speed wifi available for all guests. What else could I ask for? After all, making the stay even sweeter, it is all paid for.

The next morning, we were picked up by Dr Farizul and headed to the Dept of Bioprocess Engineering. Dr Farizul is a PhD graduate from Newcastle University and I was delighted that he took it upon himself to drive us to the University and the Northern part of Perlis later that afternoon in my most fav brand car.

I would think that the bio-process engineering is basically a chemical engineering department with emphasis to bio processes, but the fundamental is still chemical engineering. But obviously with w degree in bio-process, companies in other fields, say oil and gas, would hesitate in employing them. But that's another story and entry.

I am happy to do my part, no matter how small it is and I think we all should be able to contribute more to the society than doing an all expense paid lecture like the one I did at UNIMAP last week. IT is too easy, though in honesty, it is tough to get out from my daily routine at the office and take a one hour flight up North and get in front of 100 students and do my lecture.

I am not use to standing up in front of students. I told them not to give me a hard time by asking probing questions. I am used to stand in front of my peers or senior in the industry or even lecturing the lecturers in certain topics, but students, I am not used to.

Would we take our own time and money and do lectures for students at the public universities out of our sheer interest in making sure the students would be equipped with whatever is needed in the industry. I wish I can answer yes to that question, but unless I am already in the midst of doing it, I think I would refrain from portraying to you that I am already doing it.

An easier part of giving would be by allowing students to do internship at the office, but that's easy. I don't have to do much other than to agree to take them in.

Anyway, but there is reward for doing good deeds, though I prefer to receive mine in the hereafter. Sometimes you may get something in this world without having to wait, but I hope that the perceived reward in this world would not preclude me from what I hope would be my entitlement in the hereafter.

Here is my reward.

Harumanis with pulut at Titi Tinggi

Aah, heavenly

I could not understand why Perlis is the only state with Harumanis. I am jealous obviously as I can be driving 500 km just to get my share of the sweetest mango in Malaysia. It is too far and even though I can be considered as a hantu mempelam, I won't drive that far for it.

Doc Farizul and Nabil of UNIMAP told me that it could be the heat. Perlis is notoriously hot, they said. As if we in KL:could experience the four seasons. But they may be right. THe radiation in Perlis is such that you would not want to go out all and would rather stay indoor during the day.

If there is a next trip, i would like to get some saplings of Harumanis so that I can try and grow them in wintry Kuala Lumpur. LOL.

Harumanis Farm in Titi Tinggi

Alas we are at the end of the season and coupled with Sukma, price of Harumanis has skyrocketed. IT is not more expensive than the king of fruits - The Musang King. At RM25-30 per kg, I am not sure if many can afford to taste the Harumanis.

ONly the rich can afford Harumanis in Malaysia

Let me give you my opinion on Harumanis. I love the sweet taste of it. There is not a tinge of sour for Harumanis. It is 100% sweet, so for that part I love it so much. The sticky rice is just right, with a tad of salty taste and hence complemented the sweet Harumanis.

Perfect.

Yes, I would plant it in front of house and replace the Chokanan.

But I found that it lacks substance. The flesh is too light for my liking and that eating Harumanis does not fill your mouth up.

The Harumanis research plantation at UNIMAP. Only for the VVIP, according to Doc Farizul.
Apparently they are not VVIP enough and neither was I :)

Or your stomach.

It is kinda melt in your mouth type of fruits. So the moment it is in your mouth, in no time you will lose it to your stomach. It didn't linger on in your mouth for long. So you need to continue eating to have a feel of Harumanis. I wish it is slightly denser and hence it stays longer in your mouth

I have 4 kg at home and may be I will try and compare it with the Indians or Pakistani mangoes.

For now, let me enjoy my RM26 per kg Harumanis as part of my being away from work last week.

Yummmy.

Dr Farizul in the middle with Nabil and Ir Hj Juares at the end of the lecture

Oh my Golf!

Flight 17B - Novice flight except for one. No, not me.

I never thought I would be taking up golf, especially at this age.

Years ago when I was a student at Monash, during one of my not-that-many socializing events with many Australian coursemates, I told them that I can't see why anyone would take up golf since it is basically a hit-and-walk sport; if you can call it a sport. (They were watching golf over some beers and BBQ, while I was having milk and bread, and perhaps some snacks - really I did!)

I mean, it is one thing to be watching cricket for 5 continuous days, but watching golf would take it to another level. 

I can't, and I did not appreciate golf. Ever! I might as well watch grass grows.

Or so I thought.

So a year ago, when someone told me to take up golfing, I reluctantly agree. I bought a set for a couple of thousands ringgit - the cheapest I can find, and my uncle donated a used set to complement what I bought. The two sets would allow Arif and/or Akmal to take up golfing too. Hey, if I am going to get tortured, might as well they got tortured too, right? At least they are in good company!

But unlike cricket, which I took it to my liking the very moment I hit a couple of balls in front of my house at Clayton North in Melbourne - may be like duck to water, golf is really a hard sell for me. It is hard to imagine why anyone would go ga-ga over hitting the golf ball, which may strayed into the pond, or the forest, and started spending your precious time looking for it.

The team before the game

It is such a waste of time that I am better of spending it, say, for my forty winks!

Then, there is the weather. I mean Malaysia is a tropic country and by 8 am, the sun can really be harsh. And even if you could go as early as possible, I don't think I could finish a game while it is still cool. It takes about 3-4 hours to complete a game and by then, the sun would have been at its harshest condition.

I am no Puteri Lilin, but I prefer to be in the shade by then.

If only we are in a cold climate country.

So it was a wonder that I'd go in at 8 am and finished 18 holes by 2 pm, and honestly, I was willing to have another go at 9 holes. No complain about the sun or of being tired.

Of course it helps that we were playing at Bukittinggi. The weather was just perfect! Cool with just a slight wind. Beautiful weather, I must say and I would not mind being here all day. Beautiful natural course - cooling streams snaking all over the greens, and of course, not forgetting, the real forest!

Oh my Golf! (OMG), the story of my golfing. One of the easier bunker, I must say.

How did I fare?

Very well, I must admit. For one who is not that comfortable with a crowd, I did very well. I really enjoy the company I was in. My flight was a bunch of misfit actually (yours truly especially), who should not be on a golf course, of course, but hey we completed our game. Three of the four in the flight occupied the bottom three placings, but really, who is counting?  I had enjoyed the weather, the exercise and had a great time - no money can buy that

Well, I paid RM300.00 for that. LOL.

Too small a print for you? Good!

EPILOGUE

Just fof the record, the tournament is with the oil and gas fraternity.

Years ago I was 'dipaksa-rela' sponsor for a golf tournament. Then I thought eagle was a bird, boogie is something from the disco era, so even though I was a sponsor, I did not turn up at the event at all. Now that's a true oil baron tournament, and I should have gone to rub shoulder with them, but I knew then I should not be there as I would be lost. Totally lost in their conversation.

In hindsight, now I know I should have gone. Missed opportunity.

This game reminds me of an incident in late 80s with my peers in Kerteh. The manager walked in into our room, while we were having small dscussions, and immediately asked me, without acknowledging others - about certain issues pertaining to plant problem. I explained the problem vis-a-vis process engineering. After he left, my peers commented that since the manager did not even acknowledge them and imediately asked for me, they thought I was the manager's blue-eyed boys.

I was bewildered by that remark, though coming from them, it did not bother me - we were good friends. I think they said it more in jest than anything else. So I told them, "How could I be a blue-eyed boy? I did not play golf with him (nor was I playing golf at all). I don't socialize with him either."

But I remember my remark about golf very well then. Golf is a social event for many, unlike say a game of badminton! Especially in Malaysia right now.

That's not the way to treat a mother

Well, Mak is no longer around for me to wish her a happy mother's day.

I am not doing anything special, to be honest. I will normally read her the surah Yaa Sin after my Fajr prayer (on a weekday at the office), so I guess I'll read her the quran on a Sunday instead.

As importantly, I would like to reflect on a situation of  how not to treat your mother.

A mother nowadays is fast becoming a maid to the grandchildren, at the behest of their own children. It is sad, but I guess that's the price one had to pay for loving your children too much. I am against a mother having to take care of their grandchildren, by choice or otherwise.

It is not their job. They had spent their lifetime bringing us up and it is entirely our responsibility to bring up ours. We want to have some fun - and procreate, and then let the burden of caring for the children to our mother?

I came to know of an incident involving a mother, who had just returned from performing her Haj and was immediately asked - upon landing, mind you - to baby-sit for her grandchildren. If I were her, I probably need a month to recuperate, and prefer not be obligated to take care of anybody. Purely, unadulterated rest!

I found it distressing, and I was furious, to be honest. It is beyond comprehension actually. Apparently her daughter (and the husband) had planned it all along, and on the very same day she landed at KLIA, the husband had driven his own mother back to her hometown. His mother had been taking care of their children while his mother in law was performing the haj, and now that the mother-in-law cum 'maid' was returning home (to take care of the children), he can free up his own mother from such responsibility.

I know it is hard to believe, but it did happen the way I described it. It sounds too fictional, even to someone who knew the incident first hand. How about that for maximising the exploits of two mothers to take care of your own children and making the transfer of responsibility from his mother to his mother-in-law so efficient? Wow, am I supposed to be in awe? The two parents had fun making their children, and both want to work to earn extra money money to live a fast life; my say to them is to go and hire a maid.

(I am also against having maid aka home slave, but that's another topic.)

Sometimes I am not sure what we, as the children, are thinking when we treated our mother in that manner. Selfish would be one adjective to describe us, I guess. Shrewd? May be.

I told Arif last week as I was driving him back from LCCT after he had stayed in Kota Kinabalu as his base for the week, that when the time comes, he needs to care for his own children, and not burden his mother. I know many would be willing, and I am sure she would be willing, but there is a difference between doing something willingly, or being 'forced' literally or by circumstances.

I think, as a mother, one need to be able to differentiate our obligations as a grandparent. Yes, we all love our grandchildren - they are all adorable, but there's a limit. WE need to take care of our own health, and religion. As a child ourselves on the other hand, please, we should know better than asking for our mother's assistance. Ask her to doa for you and your children, but do not ask her to look after your children for you. That's why I had given Mak my strongest support for her stance not to care for any of her grandchildren when she was alive. I mean, she cared and loved deeply all her grandchildren, and would visit them when time permits, but she kept her distance when it comes to taking care of them.

Mine included.

She had done more than her own share of obligations by giving birth to 12 children and raising up 13. I need multiple lives to even come close to that. She was tired, I can understand that.

Moga Allah merahmati keatas ruh Mak dan dimasukkan kedalam golongan orang-orang yang beramal solleh. Amin.

Happy Mother's day.

EPILOGUE

To my friends who have grandchildren, or who aspires to have a few, hear this. It is wonderful that you love them dearly. No one can fault you, not even this blogger. Tapi kasih itu biar lah berpada. Your children have all grown up. Heck, they are even married, and adult enough to make babies. Many are doctors and engineers, teachers in their own right. Surely they can think and know how to care for their children.

Leave them - let them grow up. We can never be there for them all the time, not throughout their lives. We will go someday. They have to take care of their own families.  We can't be chipping in and assist them physically all the time. WE need to care for ourselves and work for our hereafter.

At times I think some grandparents are 'lebih sudu dari kuah'. Hahaha excuse me for using this Malay proverb. Don't shoot the messenger yah! I hope when my time comes, I would know how to behave myself. ;)